Smells Like . . .

My sense of smell is so keen, I can smell trouble a mile away.

This allows me to do things like know when the milk in the fridge has soured, select the ripest cantaloupe at the grocery store, and help cops hunt down drug smugglers at airports.

I was the first to notice when my car began to emit an unsavory smell: the combined smells of fermented yeast and horse manure.  And that was on a good day.

When temperatures rose above 70 degrees the stench was so putrid I was forced to vaporize my minivan with Glade air freshener and drive with my head out the window.  It was either that or take up smoking.

I searched high and low for the odor.  Finally, in the glove box I sniffed out something criminal:  a stack of my husband’s parking tickets.  But the only offensive thing I could smell was an argument coming on.

I checked the bottom of my shoes, hoping to find dog poop.  No such luck.

Out of desperation I paid $300 to have my car detailed inside and out.  It came back looking and smelling like new—until the next day when the fresh scent of pine gave way to the stench of German sauerkraut.

I nosed out every square inch of the vehicle until I reached the back passenger seat, where the smell intensified.  I found a small plastic container under the seat, reached in and pulled it out.

Its odor was powerful enough to bend steel.

I peered through the lid and was able to make out the leftovers from my Legal Sea Foods meal 9 days earlier: a bed of spinach, three shrimp, and a blanket of white fuzz.

After I tossed the specimen into the nearest garbage can, I made a mental note to remember to bring in the dinner leftovers from now on.

The following week, just when I thought my odors were over, my minivan began to reek again.  I followed my nose to the back passenger section, where underneath the seat I located a 3-day-old container of spaghetti and meatballs.  I was pretty sure that wasn’t Parmesan cheese on top.

I was grateful my nose served me well, even if my memory didn’t.

Next time I eat out, there’s one thing I’ll be sure to remember:  to take my husband’s car.

Note:

I would like to take this opportunity to graciously accept the Versatile Blogger award, presented to me by the illustrious Paprika.  Check out her latest post on her blog, Good Humored, to learn more about this prestigious award. 😉

Now, it is my pleasure to pass the award along to other newly discovered bloggers. Here they are, in no particular order:

Lighten Up Weber

Life Just Keeps Getting Weirder

Candice and Co.

Shannon Colleary

Limit Reached

Blaugra

The Unvarnished Mom

Planet Mom

Sips of Jen and Tonic

Culdesacked

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Tags: Humor, Legal Sea Foods, Main Street Musings Blog, odor, sense of smell, smell, Smell and Taste